MBARE, PIDDAVERU...?

 

KILAUEA - Make Kilauea Great Again... see? I made a super lava fountain, 300 meters high!

ETNA - Geez, mate... rrrreally? (showing its over-1000 meters high fountain of year 2021) Am I supposed to say "bravo"??

UOMINI E VULCANI

 

ETNA - So, Italy is that wonderful place where they've been building inside volcanoes for centuries... rejecting anti-seismic policies for decades ... and then, when drama happens, they give all the fault to scientists!

STROMBOLI - Or to volcanoes!

ETNA - Right!

VESUVIUS (neapolitan accent) - Hey, you, don't blame the people. Geology did not exist 300 years ago, and they did not know, while building, that me and Campi Flegrei were such bastard guys!

ETNA - But now they know, and politics don't let the people trust science, and leave them ignorant! Remember... in the 1970s they were planning to build hotels in my caldera....

STROMBOLI - and in the 1980s tourists would camp on the edge of my crater!

VESUVIUS - I know, humans are stupid... but you must live with them.

ETNA - And we want to! But they also must learn how to live with us volcanoes and accept risks.

STROMBOLI - It's either you accept and adapt to this environment, or you go and move to the Vanuatu Islands (- in sicilian- which would be much better!)

LA CURA...A OVEST!

 

CON LA SUA PRESENZA L'ETNA PROTEGGE IL FIANCO OVEST DALLE TEMPESTE DI MARE.......A EST INVECE PIOVE SEMPRE.

Mount Etna - which protects the western towns from sea storms, while in the east we always have rain - is singing Franco Battiato's song LA CURA because she loves very much the people of the west. But ... what about us, in the east???

CHE LINGUA LUNGA... COSA ASSAGGERAI?

 

E' UN PO' INDECISA, LA   AIUTATE...?😅😅

🇬🇧 Etna is confused about her dinner... will she "taste" Bronte's pistachios? Prickle-pears' jam in Adrano? Or pasta with wild vegetables as they do it in Biancavilla ?

TU NON SEI NORMALE (O FORSE SI...)

 

ETNA -- DWARFY, YOU ARE NOT NORMAL AT ALL, YOU KNOW THAT?

STROMBOLI SHOWS A BIG SAYING WHICH READS:

SOME HUMANS DO:

Believe in chemtrails, spend life looking for dead people from "sudden strokes",believe vaccinations have killed over 40 mill people, believe in "super tumors",believe in flat Earth, believe their political rivals are all pedophiles, believe Egyptians were aliens, believe that drinking bleach is the best cure, believe the Pope is the devil ....................... they can elect criminals as presidents, can believe it is normal to deport 2 million people, can deny the Shoah, believe Putin is a peace-maker, think judges are terroritst and doctors are killers, think volcanoes erupt because the wind blows, think wars can bring democracy and are "in God's name"..........

ETNA --- DWARFY, I DO APOLOGIZE!

DAZI VULCANICI

 

TRADUZIONE PER CHI NON CAPISCE IL SICILIANO E/O L'ITALIANO TRUMPIANO!!!

ITA

TRUMP  - HEY VULCANA, GUAI A TE SE MANDI LA TUA LURIDA CENERE SULLA MIA BASE DI SIGONELLA. E' PRODOTTO ITALIANO SU TERRITORIO AMERICANO, SE LO FAI TI FACCIO PAGARE UN DAZIO MOLTO SALATO.

ETNA - COMPARE... INNANZI TUTTO, ABBASSA QUEL DITO. POI, SMETTILA DI URLARE CHE NON SIAMO ALLA PESCHERIA. IO LA MIA CENERE LA BUTTO DOVE MI PARE, SE VUOI IL DAZIO TE LO PAGO...............

...........MA TE LO PAGO CON LA MIA MONETA, LE BOMBE VULCANICHE. E SE TI MANDO LA PIU' PICCOLA POI PER TROVARTI DEVONO USARE IL MICROSCOPIO NUCLEARE, PENSA CON LA PIU' GROSSA. CHE DOBBIAMO FARE??

TRUMP - EHM... PENSO CHE TORNERO' NEGLI USA COL PRIMO AEREO. ADDIO, CAPO!

ETNA - BRAVO, TORNATENE ALLA FIERA.

---------------------------------------------------------

ENGL

TRUMP --- HEY VOLCANA,  BEWARE IF YOU SEND YOUR FILTHY ASHES TO MY BASE IN SIGONELLA. IT IS AN ITALIAN PRODUCT ON AMERICAN TERRITORY, IF YOU DO THAT I WILL MAKE YOU PAY A VERY HEAVY DUTY.

ETNA --- WELL, MATE ... FIRST OF ALL, LOW THAT FINGER DOWN. THEN, STOP SCREAMING SINCE WE ARE NOT AT THE FISH MARKET. I WILL THROW MY ASHES WHEREVER I WANT, IF I MUST PAY THE DUTY I WILL PAY ...............

...........BUT I WILL USE MY OWN CURRENCY, THAT IS... THE VOLCANIC BOMBS. AND IF I THROW THE SMALLEST ONE ON YOUR HEAD THEN THEY'LL HAVE TO USE THE NUCLEAR MICROSCOPE TO FIND YOU, GO FIGURE WHAT HAPPENS WITH THE BIGGER ONE.  SO??? WHAT SHOULD WE DO??

TRUMP - UH... I THINK I'LL GO BACK TO THE USA ON THE FIRST PLANE. GOODBYE, BOSS!

ETNA - GOOD BOY, GO BACK TO THE FAIR.

NO RULES

 

YOU KNOW THOSE "GENIUSES" WHO SAY THEY DON'T NEED RULES...THOSE WHO PRIDE THEMSELVES FOR NOT PAYING TAXES, DON'T NEED MEDICAL CARE, DON'T GIVE A SH*** OF SPEED LIMITS... DON'T NEED A GUIDE ON EXCURSIONS....

YES, THOSE WHO GO SWIMMING NO MATTER THE "SHARK ALERT", OR GO TAKE PHOTOS TO HIGH WAVES NOT CARING OF THE WEATHER ALERT...

THESE ONES...

THESE ARE THE ONES WHO, SOMEDAY, FALL INTO RAVINES AND SAY "MOUNTAIN IS DANGEROUS" !!!!!!!

CODICE DI BENVENUTO

 

ETNA: Hey, dwarfy, the humans did it again! They put at the head of the world two guys who are bad and worse! They will dominate and destroy the world.

STROMBOLI: what do you mean by "destroy"?

ETNA: they can come to you and decide to drill all over you... or they come to me and decide to cut all my woods, leaving me naked!

STROMBOLI: bast***!!!

ETNA: No come on... let's be kind anyway. Let's greet them with our special welcome code of the Sicilian hospitality. I'll say "welcome" to Trump.

STROMBOLI: I'll say "welcome" to Musk. At three.... one, two....

THREE!

800A is a code "hiding" a typical word of the Sicilian dialect, not so nice to be honest😜😜, but so perfect for this kind of welcome parade! You can read it as "sooka".

MARSILI, NON C'E' BISOGNO DI TE...

MARSILI:

- Ok, let's get out of the sea and see if....

                           ==  ???!!! ==

- Nope... they DEFINITELY don't need me. With those guys around, they will destroy themselves in a very short time....
 

25 NOV -- NO VIOLENCE DAY

 

NOVEMBER 25....NO GENDER VIOLENCE DAY

What does it mean?

You must never hit or touch a lady, not even with a flower.

(STROMBOLI: did you see her? if I only try to touch her hard, she will throw me in the deep of the Marianas Trench!)

But it also means you must not insult nor mock your dwarfy friend only because he is shorty and a bit ugly....

and you must respect: little volcanoes that smell of sulphure, volcanoes that sleep or are extincts.... and respect fragile people, weak men, gay&lesbians, people with handicap and so on....

L'ISLANDESE CATTIVO

 

🇬🇧

- Etna: how can you do that? If I only try, my people will make me regret being born. Your people don't say anything at all?

Icelandic Volcano: People...? WHAT people? hahahahaah😈