L'ETNA, IL TEIDE E SINNER

 

--------------------------- 

HELLO ETNA, I'VE GOT BAD NEWS FOR YOU: YOU ARE NOT THE "HIGHEST ACTIVE VOLCANO IN EUROPE"   

----  SPAIN'S MOUNT TEIDE IS 3718 m HIGH, THAT IS 300 m MORE THAN YOU, AND SINCE IT LAST ERUPTED IN 1909 AND TODAY IT STILL HAS GOT  STEAM FUMAROLES AND HOT SPOTS... IT IS ACTIVE AND GOT THE RECORD!

ETNA -- ARE YOU KIDDING ME? IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE SAYING THAT TENNIS NUMBER 1 CHAMPION IS NOT JANNIK SINNER BUT JOHN McENROE, ONLY BECAUSE McENROE WON IT ALL BACK IN 1981 AND TODAY HE SOMETIMES STILL PLAYS TABLE TENNIS WITH HIS OLD AGE COMPANIONS!     (hey, easy with modesty!)

MT TEIDE (in Spanish) --- WELL, BABY, DON'T TAKE IT SO BAD! WHAT ABOUT A REMATCH??

INVIDIOSO E RISTRETTO

 

STROMBOLI MAKES FUN OF ETNA BECAUSE OF THE CROWD AROUND THE ERUPTION WHICH FORCED TO LEGAL RESTRICTIONS AND FORBIDDEN AREAS.

WELL ... HE SOON REALIZES THAT IF THIS HAPPENS, IT MEANS A HUGE NUMBER OF PEOPLE ARE GOING ON ETNA !!! AND THEY DON'T GO TO SEE HIM!

SO, PLEASE, PEOPLE... GO INVADE STROMBOLI AS WELL! GIVE HIM HIS "RESTRICTIONS" AND HIS CROWDS! MAKE HIM A HAPPY AND "RESTRICTED" VOLCANO !!!.....................(though he already is quite a lot restricted in size!!!!)

MAI COME TRUMP

 

VOLCANO MARSILI -- I want the Thyrrenian Sea! I need it for my private security!!

ETNA -- Did you hear it?

STROMBOLI -- Yeah... YUK! he speaks just like Trump!

VOLCANO MARSILI -- Like Trump? Are they really comparing me with that awful orange MAFIA BOSS????....No, I don't want this.............Uhm, hello dear friends. If I will ever come to surface, will you kindly allow me to also enjoy the Thyrrenian Sea, please?

ETNA -- Wow, what a big change! Not even the worst sea monster wants to be like Trump!

CHIEDETEGLI SCUSA

 

ETNA: "MOUNT ETNA IS SCARY"... DID YOU REALLY WRITE THAT?

STROMBOLI: REALLY? DO YOU BELIEVE ETNA IS SCARY?

ETNA: 50% ITALIANS WISH TO HAVE A BEAST LIKE TRUMP AS PRESIDENT, JUSTIFY A MAFIA GANGSTER LIKE PUTIN AND TOLERATE AN ANIMAL SUCH AS NETANYAHU....

STROMBOLI: ...AND IS ETNA THE ONE YOU CONSIDER SCARY?

ETNA: YOU GLORIFY INVASIONS, ATTACKS, BOMBINGS, DEPORTATIONS, GENOCIDES... AND THEN ...

STROMBOLI: ...THEN YOU SAY IT'S VOLCANOES THAT ARE SCARY AND DANGEROUS?

ETNA: YOU MOCK HONEST PEOPLE, DEMOCRACY, LEGAL RIGHTS, HUMAN RIGHTS, YOU PROTECT THIEVES, TERRORISTS, KILLERS.... AND I AM THE DANGER???

STROMBOLI: I MUST TELL YOU ... IF WE VOLCANOES COULD EVER HAVE CHILDREN, WE WOULD NEVER  EVER EVER  LET YOU HUMANS GET CLOSE TO THEM.  SHAME ON YOU ALL.  AND NOW, DO APOLOGIZE !!